Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t buy bullshit

Ravens in "introductory stage" of Lamar Jackson extension talks - NBC Sports

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

If there exists a “New York of Australia”, is it Sydney or Melbourne?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t cotton to rapists

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I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

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I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

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I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I see through liars

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Solar Storms Are Pushing Elon Musk’s Satellites Back to Earth - Gizmodo

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Why doesn't speeding significantly decrease one’s commute time? I've done a lot of road trips and driving and have experimented by increasing speed by 10–20%, but somehow this never equates to arriving 20% sooner, even on clear roads.

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Anthony Richardson sidelined by shoulder injury - NBC Sports

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

How can I help my cat adjust to sleeping in its own room after allowing it to sleep with us as a kitten?

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

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When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I can read

I actually pay taxes

What should I do if I love someone who does not love me?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Why are some people afraid of monsters?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Will friendly dogs protect their owners?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I have complete contempt for fakery

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I can count

I have a reading level above third grade

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.